Date Disaster
Okay, I’ve had my share of bad dates with women, but this one definitely takes the cake.
I met this girl randomly in a bar, exchanged numbers and Email addresses, shot a few Emails back and forth, and decided to meet today for dinner at a place called “Teaism” in DC. It was scheduled on a Wed night because it takes away from the pressures of a “real date” on a weekend. Everything went well, we had dinner, drove around a little, she did the whole “tour guide” thing as we passed through different parts of DC. I dropped her off at her car. We hang out in her parked car and just chatted away about everything, from our opinions on Wal-Mart to what we do for our careers.
At the end of the night, she asked me what my last name was. I’m usually careful about my personal safety and it’s the first “real date” with her, I decided to not to tell her. After a few jokes to deflect the question, she seemed really determined to find out my last name. Should it really matter? Is it just another example of women wanting what they can’t easily have (in this case, information)?
I politely hinted that I’m not going to tell her, and she basically showed an attitude, somewhat like how little girls act when they don’t getting what they want. Do all women act like this, even though they’re grown (in this case, older than me)? If I put up with that, does that mean she’ll get everything she wants from now on or she’ll just keep showing that attitude?
I said “Well, I guess we’re not meant to be, it was great seeing you again, I’m going to get going.” She said “like wise” and I left her car and we both drove off in different directions.
Afterwards, I decided to do the “right thing” and sent her an Email offering to be friends. “Hey, just wanted to shoot an Email and tell you I had a good time tonight. Sorry things didn't work out, but I'd still like to be friends, or at least one of your jack@$$ associates. You know, the occasional dinner and stuff.
Talk to you later,
--Paul.”
Her reply was expectedly obnoxious.
“no thank you.
thank you for dinner.
i never care to see you again.
good luck and best wishes.
goodbye.
please do not contact me again.”
But still, I’m glad things happened the way it did. It just shows I “click” with a certain type of people, and she just isn’t one of them.
I met this girl randomly in a bar, exchanged numbers and Email addresses, shot a few Emails back and forth, and decided to meet today for dinner at a place called “Teaism” in DC. It was scheduled on a Wed night because it takes away from the pressures of a “real date” on a weekend. Everything went well, we had dinner, drove around a little, she did the whole “tour guide” thing as we passed through different parts of DC. I dropped her off at her car. We hang out in her parked car and just chatted away about everything, from our opinions on Wal-Mart to what we do for our careers.
At the end of the night, she asked me what my last name was. I’m usually careful about my personal safety and it’s the first “real date” with her, I decided to not to tell her. After a few jokes to deflect the question, she seemed really determined to find out my last name. Should it really matter? Is it just another example of women wanting what they can’t easily have (in this case, information)?
I politely hinted that I’m not going to tell her, and she basically showed an attitude, somewhat like how little girls act when they don’t getting what they want. Do all women act like this, even though they’re grown (in this case, older than me)? If I put up with that, does that mean she’ll get everything she wants from now on or she’ll just keep showing that attitude?
I said “Well, I guess we’re not meant to be, it was great seeing you again, I’m going to get going.” She said “like wise” and I left her car and we both drove off in different directions.
Afterwards, I decided to do the “right thing” and sent her an Email offering to be friends. “Hey, just wanted to shoot an Email and tell you I had a good time tonight. Sorry things didn't work out, but I'd still like to be friends, or at least one of your jack@$$ associates. You know, the occasional dinner and stuff.
Talk to you later,
--Paul.”
Her reply was expectedly obnoxious.
“no thank you.
thank you for dinner.
i never care to see you again.
good luck and best wishes.
goodbye.
please do not contact me again.”
But still, I’m glad things happened the way it did. It just shows I “click” with a certain type of people, and she just isn’t one of them.
posted by Paul Zhao | 7/06/2006
19 Comments:
you are a true pimp!
why wouldnt you tell her your name?
Why wouldn't I tell her my last name? The "diplomatic" answer is "Cuz it's the first date and for safety reasons". But I know at the time, I just wanted to see how she'd act if she didn't get something she wanted.
And a true pimp would probably just make up a lastname and tell her and keep things "smooth". Guess I'm not a true pimp. :)
Your thinking on not telling your last name is weak, like your asian mustache! http://www.google.com/search?hl=en&q=asian+mustache
#3!!!
Are you fucking retarded?
i share your pain, man... lol. i am the bad date queen! it's all good tho. her loss for being so nosy and persistent right?? there's plenty more fish in the sea! go get 'em stud ;)
You call THAT a bad date? Damn, lucky you!
Thomas, you're losing it bro, I used to ranked #2 for "Asian Mustache" in Googe.
Anonymous: Yes, on some days, I'm extremely retarded
Thanks for the love, Ana. We need to keep our heads up and NOT be such screwups, or retards like mentioned by Anonymous. :)
And Jen, yes, that's my worst date ever. I've had a few "pleasant not returning my call"s, but never "please do not contact me again"s. Care to share some of yours?
--Paul.
I probably wouldn't ask someone's last name on a first date (just usually doesn't come up), however, that being said, if it DID come up and they avoided the question like the plague, I'd probably be creeped out (wondering what you had to hide) but not mad or rude. *shrug*
hahaha...WOW that was really fierce of her.
nonetheless, if she went on a date in the hope to be with you, and obviously she seemed quite interested in you, i bet she would have been angry that you said "we were not meant to be".
Perhaps she's feeling that ure toying with her.
You had a good time and good conversation. That's not a bad date!
MY worst date? This past V-Day. I spent hours planning cooking a romantic dinner. My date spent an hour (I timed it) talking about his ex-girlfriend. Then, when I gently reminded him that it was V-Day, he apologized and changed topics. He then spent an hour talking about economics. I had to make out with him to shut him the hell up!
I guess so, Allison. But I was being polite as I can, trying to joke my way out of it and everything, like "My last name's Hernandez, don't I look like a Hernandez?" But she was really determined to know for some reason, maybe for the same reason I'm thinking of the future "will she always behave like that", she's thinking of the future as well "will he always hide things from me".
Serendipity, I didn't say anything about "not meant to be", I said "sorry it didn't work out". I was trying to "do the right thing" and try to be friends and everything, that was kinda weird.
Jen, niiiiiiiice. :) So you got to make out at the end of the date. I got to drive home weirded out. Even though you had to listen to stuff you didn't want to listen to, I think you still came up on top on this one. :)
this sounds like a seinfeld episode
I don't watch much Seinfeld, but does he have terrible dates like this?
you "click" with a certain type of people????? What people, the ones who don't ask your last name. LAME. Tell her your last name dumbass!!!
No, Will, the type of people that're not pushy and not show a total attitude just because she doesn't get something she wants.
Like I've been saying, if she's gonna be like that over something this stupid, that just means she'll get anything she wants in the future, no matter how stupid it is, just by doing that over and over.
That's the type of girl I'd rather not get to know too well.
I understand about not giving out your last name. I don't give out my last name because I do care about my safety issues. What if some guy wanted to look me up? Nowadays, you can never tell if someone is going to be a stalker, rapist, or whatever. I like my privacy. If she was that adamant about your last name, the question is why? It's too soon in a "first date" scenario to be thinking, "will he always hide things from me", or be that persistent about something that really, is pretty inconsequential. I'd be asking questions more like, what do you do for a living? What do you like to do in your spare time? If you are secretive about what you do, then you have something to hide. If she was worried about you being a stalker, or wanted to google you or find out more about you, then why didn't she just come out and say, "I've had bad experiences in the past with stalkers, etc. and for my safety purposes to make sure you're not some psycho killer/rapist, I'd like to know your full name. Mine is (insert her full name)" this way, she is giving her personal information as her show of trust, to receive your information and trust back. So, you've got several aspects that are "huh?" about the whole date. Why why was the information so important to her and why so forceful about getting answer without explaining why she wanted the information so badly in the first place?
please tell me how on the second or third date you can tell someone is not a rapist that you couldn't see on the first date??? For heaven's sake Ted Bundy made dozens of girls make them feel like he was a nice person. There isn't a "type" for for a rapist. They can be charming or assholes just the same.
Lanni, I don't think the information itself is important to her that she has to get it, I think the fact that she isn't getting something she wants is important to her that she has to get it. If it's not my last name, I'm guessing it could be something totally stupid that she could get persistant and pissed over anything that she doesn't get. And that's the type of girl I'd rather not be around.
And Will knows first hand at how anyone could be a rapist, right? Interactive marketing account manager Will by day, serial rapist looking for his next victim by night. :) j/k
I would be pretty weirded out if my date wouldn't tell me his last name. It seems a pretty basic thing to know about someone, especially if you're hanging out and having a good time together. Maybe the topic wouldn't come up on a first date, but if it did, I would expect that the guy would tell me -- just like I'd tell him if he asked me. Unless I was getting a super-weird vibe from him, then I wouldn't tell. But you guys seemed to be getting along until that point.
I guess maybe I'd see it as a dis if the guy wouldn't give me his name... that might explain why she got mad (I do think she overreacted, by the way... just trying to bring another perspective).
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